Let me start by saying none of the following events are true disasters, but in the current climate, things tend to exaggerated, and furthermore, I really like alliteration.
This week's topic is about my kitchen experiences of late, particularly some of the things that didn't go quite as planned, for some reason or other.
For the past couple of months, I have sort of modified my weekly shopping planning and trips to the store. This is obviously influenced by the local lockdowns and social distancing. Like most everyone else, I reacted to the first notice of "lock down" by quickly preparing a list of all the items I thought I would need from the store, items that would tie me over for 7-10 days, if not a bit longer. I won't go so far as to say Hamsterkauf (the German word for panic buying/hoarding), but I did select items in larger quantities, knowing that I would not be able to zip off to the store for "1 or 2 things" whenever I felt like it. At least for the foreseeable future.
In fairness, I tend to manage my Lebensmittel as a regular inventory exercise; I basically purchase certain items each week whether I totally need them or not. To illustrate this point, I can say that I did NOT have to go buy all the toilet paper off the shelf, since I already was well stocked, proof that my "pick up another 4 pack this week" has been working really well for me over the years. On the other side, I have had a few moments where I suddenly found my perishable items a little too overstocked, milk being the prime example. I hate it when I suddenly look at 3 liters of milk all with the same expiration date of the current date.
At any rate, during March, I did notice with some dismay that several shelves in the supermarket were terribly empty, and it made me a little sad and a little frightened. However, I also knew (and know) that my own situation is rather comfortable, and I was able to put the irritations and disappointments behind me. I probably did not really need another can or two of tomatoes in the immediate future. The three already sitting on the counter at home would last.
Milk, however, was a little bit of concern. I am a chugger (see one the previous posts from years ago), and I like my milk fresh. Most of the time, I just need the milk for coffees, but as mentioned, sometimes chugging a liter is the right thing to do, so I need to keep well stocked.
I use two different grocery stores as part of my normal routine. One is a standard supermarket, with larger selections, along with household cleaning items, paper products, soaps, and the like. The other market is a little biomarkt, which tends to have smaller quantities and better quality product. In fact, their flour tortillas are quite good, and I am kind of a fan of their tostada chips. The majority of my culinary repertoire is Tex-Mex, and while that may sound silly coming from a guy that lives in Germany, one can't forget where I come from and how much the cuisine means to me. Since such restaurants are few and far between (about 3000km apart), I had to learn how to cook the stuff. So, thankfully I have shops that can sort of cater to my needs.
Back to milk. Just before Easter, I made my trip to Denn's, the organic market, and knew that I needed to pick up a few liters of milk, as the dairy shelf had been empty on my previous visit. As I rounded the corner with my buggy and glanced at the dairy case, I noticed the familiar blue and white carton of....milk! I almost ran over a lady who was buying wine, but I apologized profusely and wheeled over to the dairy section, where, although somewhat bare, a few liters of milk were waiting for me to put in my cart.
I finished my shopping and returned home with a smile on my face, knowing that I had milk that would get me through at least 10 days, even with a couple of late night chugging sessions.
As I was putting the groceries away in my kitchen, I noticed one of the cartons of milk had an extra little label on it, then I noticed that ALL of the cartons had it.
Lactose free.
This is when I did my little "I am really pissed off at a lot of things" dance. I do NOT like lactose free products. It is not as if I am lactose-free intolerant, but I don't enjoy the taste. But, I figured I would just pretend it was fat-free milk or something, so that the next time I would have proper milk, I would enjoy it all the more. It wasn't the end of the world, but annoying all the same. I would say it is similar to doing something like buying a bunch of AAA batteries, only to find out that your remotes all use AA. I learned from that experience, too.
Fortunately, it was a one time mishap, and subsequent trips to the store have involved a very alert Bryan carefully reading the milk label and selecting the correct item.
Now, to other priority staples. When the first wave of lock downs sent everyone rushing off to buy anything and everything from the shelves of their local markets, I did try to apply some logic and ration to my purchases. While I wasn't really worried about toilet paper, I was a little uncertain about coffee. I had purchased a kilo of bean at my local Kaffee-Rösteri, but I had a bad feeling that they would have to close up for some period of time. Not that I am a total coffee snob, I am particular about my coffee products. One of my friends in Greece and I have regularly compared notes on the art of being baristas, and as most people know, the bean is extremely important. True, I have been fortunate to live a few minutes away from one of the better coffee roasters in the city, if not the state. But, I do have contingency plans for such situations, and that involves product that is mass produced.
Lavazza and Illy come to mind, and Illy product is usually my plan B. The problem is, they usually only have ground coffee containers in my supermarket. And it is a little pricey, especially in comparison to my local roaster, who is also expensive but well worth it. During one trip to the store, I figured I would just resign myself to buying ground espresso for a while, but as I pulled the container off the shelf, I heard the delightful sound of whole bean inside. I immediately elected to try and buy as much as could, at least a kilo, which meant 4 containers. The problem was, the Illy containers all look alike. They are completely silver, rather stylish, and even though there is some really small print that does indicate grounds instead of whole bean, it is not as clear as you might think.
So, I ended up touching all of the containers on the shelf and playing them like maracas in order to try and find another container of bean. This is EXACTLY what irks other shoppers in the store; no one likes to see someone touching everything only to buy one item. I sheepishly murmured an apology to a few people who weren't so enthused with my impromptu percussion concert, saying something to the effect that it was an emergency. Gotta have the bean.
I am not really sure if it was a one time thing or what, but since that trip, Illy bean is no more in the store, only the ground coffee. Thanks to my plan C, I picked up a kilo of shade grown organic espresso bean in my bio markt the next trip. And that is where the problem started. Many times, coffee bean from such stores is older than the "good stuff" my local roaster offers. And, the age of the bean matters, as I found out when I was grinding and pouring espresso shots a couple of days later.
My shots were all over the place, I was hardly getting more than 4 bars of pressure. (The sweet spot is more around 8-10 bars). I thought back to Stergios training, and had to adjust my grind, my quantities and here, a kilo or two later, my coffees are back on track. Patience and discipline, to quote Frau Merkel.
Now, on the subject of actual cooking, it is not as if EVERYTHING I eat is Tex-Mex. For a little variety, I did pick up some little sausages one day, and not long after that, I stocked up on some salmon, which is my main source of seafood and omega 3s.
Salmon is a bit tricky, but in the past year or so I have become one with my skillet, and manage to be pretty consistent with my preparation. Until this past week. Two times in a row, I thawed my salmon, did all the right prep work, but minutes later found myself looking at some real grey yuck in the pan. I did not notice a fishy smell, but it looked like crap, and the result was a far cry from tasty. True, I did eat about half of it, telling myself it was not that bad, but the more I got to thinking about it, the worse I felt. It didn't help that I had just watched a move about a big shark the night before, so was a little squeamish when it came to stuff from the sea. And what was in my pan looked a whole lot like what Meg ate as she swam around terrorizing the people stupid enough to go out on the boat and look for her.
In all, I had purchased 4 packages of frozen salmon, and the first two had not gone well. The third came out even worse, which prompted the fourth to simply be thrown out. Maybe it's my freezer, or maybe it was a bad batch or something.
Let's just say for now, I am off salmon. When I was little and learning how to make simple meals for myself, I got hooked on peanut butter and honey sandwiches. I enjoy both very much, but one day, I overdid the honey. It actually saturated the bread, and when I pulled my lunch bag out at school, it grossed me out.
It took me 20 years before I ate another peanut butter and honey sandwich, and I am really hoping that I won't have to wait as long with my next salmon experience. We shall see.
Discouraged but not hopeless, I emptied the fishy trash and decided to fry up my sausages. To be fair, I have always struggled to do sausages properly, primarily because I don't want to experience the misadventures of eating undercooked pork.
Unlike my barista-ing or my abilities with Tex-Mex, I still cannot get my act together with sausages, which is a shame, really, because I quite enjoy them. But I cannot cook them to save my soul.
I actually apologized to my skillet as I was cleaning it, saying that it was entirely my fault and lack of skill that resulted in what looked remarkably similar to blackened salmony yuck.
If anyone was wondering why my current post is a couple of days late, it's because of poor cooking experience; all of this happened towards the end of last week.
I returned to basics, and figured it would be best if I did something a little more edible and simple. Why I used so much gouda cheese on my nachos is anyone's guess, but those really sucked. Unfortunately, my favorite cheese blends were a little scarce during one of the market trips, so I thought I would be creative. I am not off of gouda, but got a little closer than I would have liked.
Now would have been the perfect time to go out for a schnitzel or a pizza or something, but oh, that's right, the restaurants are all closed.
Back to the biomarkt for the weekly shopping trip, I wheeled through the aisle and was delighted to find that the tortillas were back in stock. With a little grin, I bought all their packets, then picked up some ground beef and chicken. Time to do things right.
I am delighted to report that I made beef quesadillas over the weekend, and they were absolutely incredible, especially since my homemade salsa also came out really well.
And how about the chicken flautas I made for dinner last night?
Fucking awesome.
Order is almost restored in my kitchen, and will be even better when I get through this last half liter of lactose free milk.
keep the faith
bryan
soundtrack -
The Clash - Lost in the Supermarket
Carter USM - Shoppers' Paradise
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