Milk it does the body...

Just a quick one to let you know that my sense of humor hasn't completely disappeared, despite the challenges of my life just now.

As you know, I'm quite the coffee fiend, and the weekend ritual involves me getting up, usually with some level of hangover, and preparing a little espresso with my stovetop machine. The sell Lavazza at my local market, and that's a pretty good thing.

A week ago, right before my parents left town, I bought a few liters of milk, noting the sell by date but not too worried; it was possible that I'd be in Edinburgh late in the week, but would still have good milk upon my return, at least for Saturday morning.

Well, you've already read about my crap week, and let it be said that last Friday night I went out and tied one on.

Thus, I was fully ready for my Saturday morning coffee when I woke up. My little machine worked great as usual, and I poured the steaming espresso into my mug. Then, I poured the last of my milk into the mug, then set it down on the counter to cool for just a minute.

Powered up the laptop, connected to the internet to check the headlines, then went back to collect my coffee. The surface of the liquid looked a little funny, so I stuck a spoon in the mug and gave a bit of a stir. Well, apparently all of the milk curdled right on the spot; there was nothing but a big spongy mass of yuck.

For those of you who enjoy traditional onion soup, you know it is usually served with a sizable crouton on the bottom of the soup bowl. Every once in awhile, the soggy bread tends to gross me out, which is why I don't go out of my way to have onion soup all that frequently.

The disaster in my coffee mug was that times ten. I feared for a moment that my coffee was toxic, and or worse yet, that I was about to be violently ill.

Fortunately, I threw open the back door, inhaled deeply on a cigarette, and overcame my nausea. Then, I emptied the contents of the mug into the trash, and promptly threw out the milk, swearing to myself a bit because I really needed a coffee.

I went out for a few errands, got a haircut, then stopped by the market on the way home and went to the milk aisle, where I selected a different brand of milk: Alpenfrisch Milch, 3.5% fat.

Home again, and Saturday evening, I had a tasty coffee with some super milk that even Heidi would be proud of.

There's nothing quite worse than spoilt milk, but hey, it could have been so much worse. Thank goodness I looked before I gulped.

cheers
bryan