Ah, Thanksgiving Eve. I always get a little envious of my friends and family in the states at this time of year, since Thanksgiving tends to be special. My last stateside Thanksgiving must have been about 13 years ago. Rather than try and replicate a dinner or something here in Germany, I tend to spend extra time reflecting on family and friends instead. Of course, I already reflect on them quite a bit already, and I certainly don't exclude the friends I have made outside of the US. I may be one of the few people in the world that has a German friend who has actually been to the Macy's parade. Boop.
At any rate, the month of October turned out to be rather challenging for me on a personal front. As I have worked through these challenges, I have spent rather a lot of time reflecting and contemplating. Although I have always done this, I think a notable difference this time round was the fact that I had some new resources and materials with which I could use for support.
I recently read a book all about TMS, and have explored some aspects of EFT over the past weeks, as well. Today, I am not quite prepared to write out all the thoughts and emotions in this post, partially because it is very much on a personal level. Despite this guy being one who wears his heart on his sleeve, even I have my limits of how much I will share.
That being said, there are a few recent experiences that have been particularly thought-provoking.
About a month ago, my grandmother moved into the "assisted living" wing of her community. This effectively meant that she moved about 20 meters further down the hall into a new, smaller apartment. Here, she will get more direct care and assistance. A few months ago, I wrote about how moves can suck. For my grandmother, she took it in stride, but I could tell that she was a little tense about things. I have received regular reports on how she settled, and for the most part, things are going ok. Sure, there are some differences from her more independent lifestyle. Part of this is how she is adapting to the change, in both herself and her environment. My grandmother has always been super positive, which is a wonderful character trait. She has almost never really complained about anything, as it were. Recently, she has shown brief glimpses of becoming crotchety, but only ever so slightly. I wonder about his, and look forward to some one on one time with next month where I can ask her about her feelings.
Last week, I was having a chat with a couple of people in the pub, when Alexi, a young guy from France, asked me about the number of states in the US.
"52, right?"
"No," I laughed. "There are only 50." I wasn't meaning to accost him, but I have always been really impressed with the number of people I have met around the world who seem to have so much knowledge about my home country. It is unfortunate that this phenomenon seems only to flow in one direction.
Maria responded to my joking comments by stating that one of the reasons that Americans can be unpopular around the world is the fact that they make a lot of assumptions about how much people know how about the US; it is almost as if they expect everyone to know such facts (like how many states there are in the union).
To further illustrate her point, she asked me how many provinces there are in Argentina, where she comes from.
"Erm,..."
I certainly was put in my place, and I spent the next several thinking about this on various levels. Sure, I like information, and typically I will go off and research a topic after a discussion with someone. (That night, I went home and read up on the wonderful country of Argentina. 23, if you are wondering.)
It was not so much that we do not know certain facts, but rather that we might expect someone to know such facts. How can that be a realistic expectation? How do those perceptions come about?
A couple of days ago, I spoke further with Maria about the incident. We both had thought about it for several days, wondering if the conversation had gotten too aggressive (it was lively) or that if one of us had felt insulted. That was not the case at all; both of us have an ability to exchange such thoughts with each other because of our respect and admiration for one another.
Similarly, my Macy's parade attending friend Nadja is also really adept at helping to remind me of my place in society and the world. I consider myself to be empathetic, but what do I know about what it is like to be a refugee, or religiously oppressed, or to be a woman in the workplace?
Awareness, knowledge, understanding. These things help a lot. The reflection that I have done in recent weeks is helping me greatly, and for this I am very thankful.
Increasing my awareness and my understanding about myself, this is particularly significant. Fortunately, this is an ongoing process that I relish doing. After all, it is for me.
I am me, and I am okay.
see you out there
bryan
